70 Wild Miles; A charity triathlon in aid of CLIC Sargent

Caring for Children with Cancer.

Three Go Wild in the Country

Whil Whitmore reports on the 70 Wild Mile Challenge

Thirteen hours after we left reading, Lee Rankin, Phil McConnell and Will Whitmore arrived in Glen Coe in Scotland ready to take on the 70 Wild Mile Challenge. Hell of a journey broken only by a stop to watch the X zone.....'Phil McConnell. He's done it. Oh no, the bike's not working. This could be the greatest upset'. We were knackered when we got there so it was straight to bed for about 7 hours kip and then a quick breakfast before rushing down to the start. Seemed we were a bit late getting there but we got changed in double quick time and hammered off on the 47 mile course. Lee led from the front with Phil and I following as fast as we could along the undulating course. The long climbs were tough but there were a fair few downhill stretches too. The scenery was breathtaking enough to divert my mind from a butt that murdered and the fine weather helped us to put in some decent times. Lee came in at 1 hour 49 minutes, with Phil at 1:53 and myself at 1:57. A few eyebrows were raised but this was only the beginning...... 

After a quick refuelling stop it was time for the kayak leg. Phil and Lee both had basic general purpose plastic kayaks whereas I had managed to get hold of a sleek racing shell, christened 'the shark' by the lads. Well I had to try something to get in front of Lee. We all jumped in our boats and entered the loch ready for the 10 mile course. Lee had obviously noted the dangerous potential of my shark because as I paddled over to him and drew near he rammed me at full speed...well, nudged me in the side. So as the rest of the pack prepared for the starter's gun I was floundering around in the ball shrinking water next to my capsized canoe. Despite my unfortunate position I couldn't stop laughing while all around other kayakers whistled and cheered. Phil and Lee were also seeing the funny side but unfortunately for Lee he laughed so hard his kayak capsized and he joined me in the water. I was now being rescued by the excellent back-up boats and as my sides ached I looked over to see Lee clinging to the side of his kayak and wetting his pants. Phil was keeping well out of it and defending us from the other kayakers who were scoffing at our obvious lack of experience. I was placed back in my kayak and promptly fell out again. This had the effect of turning what had been a bit of fun into a pretty worrying set of circumstances. I had to go 10 miles in this thing. As the race started Lee and I were being refloated on the shore. We paddled along the edge successfully for a few minutes but I was then told I needed to cross the loch. It just wasn't happening. The waves were a couple of feet high and each one tossed me around like a half-cut weeble. Stability wasn't in the game plan and before long I was freezing and upside down again. The rescuers in the back-up boat were now somewhat concerned about me and as they rescued me again they questioned my choice of equipment and well-being. I was shaking like a pneumatic drill, my face had turned blue and my teeth could be heard chattering in Glasgow. So that was my race over. I was retired to the RNLI lifeboat and wrapped in blankets, sat by a heater and given cocoa to shake over my anxious assistants. Gutted but survived. Lee bravely fought on for about 3 miles before succumbing to near hypothermia and being rescued. Apparently a rather tidy lifesaver took all his kit off and wrapped herself around him to warm him up. On hearing this I tossed off my blankets, rushed down to the lake and dived in. Once ashore and cared for in the hypothermia tent, Lee warmed up and recovered well. Which just leaves Phil. The man was a legend. He battled along at an average speed of around 2.3 miles per hour in a kayak that took every possible opportunity to do 180 and 360 degree turns. With no fin or rudder and no real experience Phil made it to the finish line without capsizing, in 3 hours and 45 minutes. By this time he had christened his Kayak 'the clog' and any encouragement offered as he approached the finish line was met with a torrent of obscenities. The poor bloke was now yet another victim of the cold and was taken away to the hypothermia tent. So the English boys hadn't fared too well, tackling the course with no splash deck, no wet-suit and no experience, talent or common sense whatsoever...yet Phil had done it. Fair play. And there's more. 'More?' I hear you say. Yes in-blooming-deed. After another short recovery it was the half-marathon leg. But not just any half marathon - this one included a climb of over 1000 feet! Lee set off at a blistering 5 and a half minute mile pace and despite the climb cruised home in 1 hour 24 minutes. The furthest I had ever run was 10 km but I was pretty up-beat about it. As I went past the 7 mile mark I rejoiced at having run further than ever before and continued to tick along nicely until the nine mile mark despite the ever increasing incline. The last four miles were an uphill climb from hell but I smoothly changed gear to ease into an effortless 12 minute mile pace. How the crowd laughed and thrilled at my good humour as despite the ordeals of the day I still managed to entertain them with a Charlie Chaplin walk for the last 2 miles. 'Hardest thing I've ever done' I thought as I crossed the line in a time of 1:43. And as for Phil, well we thought that he'd struggle following the kayak of death, but the man strode on. The only one of the trio to complete the 70 Wild Miles as he crossed the line in 1:47 and a total time of 7 hours and 25 minutes. Top man! We resisted the temptation to hold a ceremonial burning of our kayaks but as Lee strapped them back to our car he heard a group of people excitedly telling a tale. 'I don't know what happened. He couldn't do it. He didn't even start. Capsized. He was fit though. And 6 foot 8 tall. 6 foot 8!' Reciting this and exerts from the X zone added to the fun and banter of the weekend which ended with a 7 hour drive back home. We all plan to go back next year but there's a certain discipline we plan to be better prepared for....

Will Whitmore